Ambivalent feelings run thru my mind at this juncture in life, when I am ready for yet another leap. Though this is not a leap year,I have suddenly accelerated things happening in my life. First I got married, so as to solve the all important issue of companionship, and with this mission having succeeded, I set my issues on other goals in life.
Change is always a difficult thing, and it was this inertia or the affinity for homeostasis that made me stick to what I was doing for the past couple of years. But finally, the simmering within, with the help of a few external catalysts made me take steps towards a brighter future.
With things shaping up well now, I am ready for the Occident to propel myself into the orbit.
Suddenly, since the past couple of months, i find in myself a new sense of confidence about work. Things sound within grasp and my sharpness seems to have increased. Ideally, I would have expected this transformation to be a gradual process, but some kind of magic wand has done the trick, or so I feel. How else would I be brimming with confidence out of the blue, atleast on the work front....
Its not been all hunky dory, though I make it sound that way. At times, the feeling of wretchedness takes its toll on me and sags my spirits to such an extent, that the frustration manifests itself in different forms like anger, anxiety etc. But some kind of divine intervention ensures that I come back on track in some time, only to repent for my actions in the last few moments.
One good thing in the process is that good sense seems to prevail and things dont get out of control. Maybe its just those minor adjustments that need to be made in life. I should be learning to enjoy more out of life, and be more open and magnanimous..this will make life a lot simpler than what it sounds in some trying moments.
Some blogs are from the heart, some out of the mind, this one seems to be a good blend of both...So its as natural as it gets when the mind is without fear and the head is held high, just to quote Gurudev Rabindranath !!! just for gags :-))
Friday, March 16, 2007
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